{"id":632,"date":"2007-07-05T13:23:32","date_gmt":"2007-07-05T17:23:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/2007\/07\/05\/networking\/"},"modified":"2026-05-02T10:46:22","modified_gmt":"2026-05-02T18:46:22","slug":"networking","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/2007\/07\/05\/networking\/","title":{"rendered":"Networking"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I went to the <a href=http:\/\/www.nextny.org\/wiki\/show\/NextNYSocial20070627>nextNY happy hour<\/a> last week, which got me thinking about the different ways in which people network.<\/p>\n<li>There&#8217;s the &#8220;agenda&#8221; networker, who wants something, whether it be funding for his startup, a new job, or an introduction to a VC, and he&#8217;s at the event to find it.  He&#8217;ll talk to people long enough to determine whether they can help him in his quest, and as soon as he determines they&#8217;re not useful (which generally doesn&#8217;t take much longer than the introductions), he moves on in search of more fruitful connections.  I find this sort of networking understandable, but annoying.  A Kantian would call it unethical because it treats other people as a means to an end rather than an end in itself.\n<p>Measure of success for the agenda networker: Whether he advanced his agenda by attending.  <\/p>\n<li>There&#8217;s the &#8220;pitch&#8221; networker, who is using the networking event as a venue to practice <a href=http:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/2006\/12\/22\/pitching-oneself\/>pitching himself<\/a>.  This is a variant of the agenda networker, but it&#8217;s less about advancing the agenda, and more to practice the pitch itself.  Networking events are a great low-pressure environment to practice pitches because if you screw up one pitch, you can move on to the next person and try a variant.  You just have to hope that the person with whom you failed the pitch isn&#8217;t the one that can help your project.\n<p>Measure of success: Practicing and refining the pitch<\/p>\n<li>There&#8217;s the &#8220;rolodex&#8221; networker, who tries to meet everybody at the event and get their business card, diligently jotting down a couple notes on each business card to remind himself of who each person is.  After the event, he will carefully file the business cards away in a folder as a record of all of the networking he is doing.  He justifies this to himself in that he might someday have a need like the agenda networker, and he&#8217;ll already have the connection he needs in his folder.  Of course, because he hasn&#8217;t maintained the connection, he may not be able to get what he wants based on a brief two minute conversation at a networking event three years before.\n<p>Measure of success: Number of business cards collected.  <\/p>\n<li>There&#8217;s the &#8220;connector&#8221; networker, using the terminology of <a href=http:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/book\/tippingpoint.html>Gladwell&#8217;s Tipping Point<\/a>.  Connectors are natural networkers, who talk to everybody for a few minutes and make each person feel like they&#8217;re the center of the universe for those few minutes.  They&#8217;re the ones that effortlessly work their way through the crowd and everybody who attended remembers talking to them.\n<p>Measure of success: Not applicable.  They were born to attend such events and experience great joy in them.  I&#8217;m jealous of them.<\/p>\n<li>There&#8217;s the &#8220;wanna be my friend?&#8221; networker, who is common at technology networking events, as he hangs around clumps of people in conversation and hopes to be invited in.  He&#8217;s looking for friends outside of the office, and figures that hanging around with other technologists is a good place to start.  He&#8217;s not at the event for business or investment reasons, but for personal reasons.\n<p>Measure of success: Meeting some people they can go for drinks with later.<\/p>\n<li>There&#8217;s the &#8220;personal relationship&#8221; networker, who I&#8217;ll call, well, me.  I don&#8217;t have an agenda, I&#8217;m not hoarding business cards &#8211; I&#8217;m there to have <a href=http:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/2004\/08\/30\/good-conversation\/>good conversations<\/a>, and possibly meet some new people.  The nice thing about this style of networking is that I can restrict myself to talking to people that I find genuinely interesting without feeling like I&#8217;m missing out on the point of attending.  It also lets me make real connections with people, rather than the shallow exchange-of-business-cards connection that the rolodex networker makes.  There&#8217;s always the chance to build on these sorts of ties in the future, as <a href=http:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/2006\/03\/20\/how-to-win-friends-and-influence-people-by-dale-carnegie\/>Carnegie would observe<\/a>, but by not starting with an agenda, the connections feel more real.\n<p>Measure of success: One good conversation and\/or finding one person that I want to stay in touch with in the future.  <\/p>\n<\/li>\n<p>This list is by no means comprehensive, but lists a few of the archetypes I have come across at such events.<\/p>\n<p>What interests me is finding an event structure that can accommodate all of these different networking styles and goals.  Different event formats lend themselves to different networking styles, as I discussed in <a href=http:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/2006\/01\/16\/meta-brainjamming\/>my post about Meta-Brainjamming<\/a>.  A happy hour is great for the connector or the &#8220;personal relationship&#8221; networker, but it&#8217;s less amenable for the agenda networker, who&#8217;d prefer to break off conversation if it&#8217;s not useful.  Conferences might work better for that type of networking as there&#8217;s always the excuse of a session to attend.  Round robin one-on-ones like the BrainJam had would be great for the Rolodexer, but annoying for others.  <\/p>\n<p>What kind of networking do you do?  What advantages and disadvantages do you see in it?  Before going to a networking event, do you assess what you are trying to get out of it, and whether your goals are compatible with the format of the event?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I went to the nextNY happy hour last week, which got me thinking about the different ways in which people network. There&#8217;s the &#8220;agenda&#8221; networker, who wants something, whether it be funding for his startup, a new job, or an introduction to a VC, and he&#8217;s at the event to find it. He&#8217;ll talk to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35,13,33],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-632","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-conversation","category-management","category-nextny"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/632","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=632"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/632\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3999,"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/632\/revisions\/3999"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=632"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=632"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nehrlich.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=632"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}